Tuesday, April 21, 2015

A Shallow, Unmarked Grave

Civility died, unnoticed, its passing mourned only by a few.

It wasn't a quick, abrupt departure, rather a slow decline into obscurity, almost unnoticed over the passing of time.

One of the places its demise is most noticed is in the Family Court System (that deals with child welfare, divorce and separation, and child custody).

In what should be halls dedicated to justice and legal standards, false allegations to CPS and police, hearsay, manipulation, perjury, Parental Alienation Syndrome, and other unjust and even criminal behaviors prevail.

Lying and presentation of false paperwork by CPS caseworkers, as well as parties jockeying for better position in divorce and custody issues, is rewarded by the courts. The squeaky wheel gets the most favorable outcome.

Espousing the truth and attempting to do the right thing is punished, and those who are hoping for justice to prevail are sadly disappointed.

The only winners are the attorneys, the court employees, and the CPS workers. They collect their fees and paychecks regardless of the outcomes. In fact, the longer a case is drawn out, the more the attorneys are able to collect and the better the CPS workers are able to justify their jobs.

The "nuclear option" is the norm - scorched earth which drives irreparable divisions between family members, and puts people in contentious and oppositional positions rather than fostering cooperation.

The losers are the parents, who have to expend time and money to fight for what should be theirs by right; the children, who are often deprived of a loving relationship with both parents; and society, which is descending further into a "zero sum" abyss (where there MUST be a winner and a loser, rather than parties that agree to disagree).

So let's raise a toast to the loss of something which will take generations to regain. Civility lies in a shallow, unmarked grave.

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