A Shallow, Unmarked Grave

Civility died, unnoticed, its passing mourned only by a few.

It wasn't a quick, abrupt departure, rather a slow decline into obscurity, almost unnoticed over the passing of time.

One of the places its demise is most noticed is in the Family Court System (that deals with child welfare, divorce and separation, and child custody).

In what should be halls dedicated to justice and legal standards, false allegations to CPS and police, hearsay, manipulation, perjury, Parental Alienation Syndrome, and other unjust and even criminal behaviors prevail.

Lying and presentation of false paperwork by CPS caseworkers, as well as parties jockeying for better position in divorce and custody issues, is rewarded by the courts. The squeaky wheel gets the most favorable outcome.

Espousing the truth and attempting to do the right thing is punished, and those who are hoping for justice to prevail are sadly disappointed.

The only winners are the attorneys, the court employees, and the CPS workers. They collect their fees and paychecks regardless of the outcomes. In fact, the longer a case is drawn out, the more the attorneys are able to collect and the better the CPS workers are able to justify their jobs.

The "nuclear option" is the norm - scorched earth which drives irreparable divisions between family members, and puts people in contentious and oppositional positions rather than fostering cooperation.

The losers are the parents, who have to expend time and money to fight for what should be theirs by right; the children, who are often deprived of a loving relationship with both parents; and society, which is descending further into a "zero sum" abyss (where there MUST be a winner and a loser, rather than parties that agree to disagree).

So let's raise a toast to the loss of something which will take generations to regain. Civility lies in a shallow, unmarked grave.

PA - Not Just for Parents Anymore!

Parental Alienation is not just limited to the parent(s) who are targeted.

When an Alienator engages in a campaign, they need to destroy all relationships that the child has with not only the target parent, but also the family of the target parent. If they don't, the child being manipulated will still be able to see and hear news of the target parent, and continue to form their own opinions.

Ken Shaw is a master of alienation manipulation with my youngest daughter. Setting aside what he did in regards to me, he also targeted my other children (her older siblings), and my other family members.

My youngest daughter has four siblings from my household.

Her oldest sister at the time of the false allegations was living and working over an hour away. But she made time to get home and spend time with her siblings at least once a month, so the little one had fairly frequent contact with her.

Her brother lived a few blocks away and was over at our house several times a week, eating dinner at least once a week and hanging out to watch movies or to go places other times.

My middle child and Ruby lived at home with the little one and me.

I am no saint, and neither are my children, although they all are very bright.

Ken Shaw deliberately targeted all of them to keep them separated from their youngest sister.

Now keep in mind, at the onset of the false allegations against Jon Massey, Ken Shaw repeatedly told the CPS workers, the AFC, my attorney, Jon's attorney, my neighbors and friends, that Ruby "was a liar" that she "told lies about his sons" and that he "didn't believe her". Not only are most of those witnesses willing to testify to Ken's statements, we even have the CPS notes that document his report to them.

But once his attorney arrived on the scene, suddenly his attitude and behavior changed. He began limiting/denying my access to my youngest daughter. He and his attorney began making false statements in court. Most importantly, he began denying my oldest two children the opportunity to see their youngest sister.

CPS made it very easy for him - they insisted that my youngest child, a US citizen who had lived in this country her entire life, be placed in Canada. Mind you, this is a Hague Convention violation which has very specific guidelines for placing children in another country. The judge and her AFC and CPS violated her rights as a US citizen. (A CPS caseworker has even come forward and stated that she should never have been placed outside the US, and worst case scenario should have been placed in a foster care.)

My oldest two children have made some mistakes in their lives, and crossing an international border isn't always easy. Canada can be very strict, and my two oldest were either ineligible, or would have to pay a $500+ bond to be allowed into the country to see their sister. That doesn't sound like much, but to a young adult with student loans and car payments it is overwhelming.

Additionally, Ken Shaw began making the false allegation that my son had told my youngest daughter that he was going to "kidnap" her and bring her home. He specifically cited a phone conversation that had occurred at a family event, in front of THREE ATTORNEYS AND A JUDGE'S WIFE, all of whom were listening and waiting to talk to my youngest daughter.

What Ken has done to my middle child goes beyond the boundaries of acceptable behavior.

In May of 2013 the family court judge (who expressed that he felt that the allegations that Ken made against me were false) permitted me to bring an adult in addition to my middle child on visitation. On one of the occasions we brought a friend of my middle daughter who was over 18 and who had spent time with the youngest one watching Disney movies.

At some point, after a confrontation in which Ken Shaw took something that one of the girls left on the table, Ken stood up in the middle of a public library, in front of the youngest child and the middle child, and began yelling at the top of his lungs at my middle child: "Your mother has molested your sister, and she molested you too! You just don't know about it yet!" He even admitted to doing so in court, but the judge's response wasn't to terminate Ken's supervision, it was to SUSPEND my middle daughter's visitation with her younger sister.

Finally, in September of 2014 we had a dispositional hearing. As part of the process, there were negotiations with Ken Shaw and his attorney regarding visitation for my middle daughter with her youngest sister. Although they had reached an agreement with my daughter and her attorney, in the hearing a matter arose over an outstanding violation petition that I had filed against Ken Shaw (for his actions revolving around and during court ordered visitation). Immediately Ken and Mary Shaw and his attorney began screaming at my daughter "If you testify in this matter, we will revoke the agreement," screaming at my daughter's attorney, "If you allow your client to testify on the violation petition, we will revoke the agreement and fight you for visitation in court," and screaming and yelling at me, "If you go ahead with this petition, we will revoke your daughter's visitation with her sister." This occurred both in front of the judge, and then continued when he went in chambers. This occurred in front of the DSS attorney, two AFCs, and the court officers. It was so egregious that on a subsequent court date when I had to be in a room with Ken Shaw's attorney, the court officer came in with me and stood by me to protect me from Ken Shaw's attorney.

Yes, I withdrew the petition UNDER DURESS. This is called witness intimidation and is a criminal offense. Yet the Family Court Judge sat there and DID NOTHING!

You would hope that it is an end to the story - but it isn't. My middle child, after all the paperwork got finalized (which took a few months because Ken Shaw decided to be less than cooperative) went to her first visitation. My middle daughter has no offenses that would cause border crossing to be an issue, and we thought it should have been a simple trip - about an hour to get there. Instead, she got pulled into Canadian Customs and her vehicle, all her belongings, and her cell phone were searched - that included searching through all her emails, Facebook posts and messages, and text messages. The Canadians claimed that it was routine, but meanwhile she was late for the scheduled visitation appointment and almost wasn't allowed to see her sister.

We thought that the second time would be easier, but she asked me to go along just in case. We had a repeat performance of the prior time, except this time they held both of us for over an hour and a half. I have been crossing the border since I was 18, and have never had these types of issues, so I began checking around. I contacted Homeland Security who referred me to Canadian Customs. We also had a friend do some casual checking on a "US customs officer" to "CA customs officer" basis and got an interesting report. Although through official channels, there was no reason either of us should be subjected to that type of behavior, the unofficial word was quite different. What we learned is that someone had given Canadian Border Patrol a document that made it appear that there was an order of protection against both me and my middle child to limit or prevent contact with my youngest daughter. There has never been such a document against my middle child, so someone apparently decided to play fast and loose with creating a false document or altering an existing one. This is no surprise - par for the course with Ken Shaw.

At any rate, after my official inquiries, the border behavior suddenly ceased. But that still doesn't mean that my daughters get to see each other as they should and were accustomed.

But there are far greater implications: An AMERICAN court and an AMERICAN government agency worked in concert to revoke and or deny the rights of not one but five AMERICAN citizens in concert with a citizen of a different country. Kinda makes you think, doesn't it?